Separation, whether official or unofficial, is often considered the prelude to divorce - a trial period during which troubled spouses can sort out the tangled issues facing them. On the other hand, some couples approach separation as a method of reconciliation, allowing them to step back and see their relationship through fresh eyes. With these two opposing viewpoints, the question is: When is separation a good idea, and when should it be avoided? In order to answer such a question, we must first understand that marriage, separation, and divorce are legal, emotional, and psychological issues which must be dealt with on all three dimensions. Before a couple separates, they should consider the following three questions: Question 1: What are my plans for the future? Separation is a bigger deal than many people think. Though it may not be as final as divorce, separating from your spouse carries a wide range of legal and emotional repercussions. While it is true that separating may give you the breath of air needed to really tackle problems in your relationship, couples who separate end up terminating their relationship more often than not. Before getting away from your spouse, sit down with him or her and discuss what the purpose of separating is. Are you trying to save your relationship? If so, will time away from each other really help, or will it just exacerbate the problem? Or, are you more interested in slowly winding down your marriage? If this is the case, have you considered what a separation will mean for your divorce proceedings? Have you talked to a divorce lawyer about the possible repercussions? Question 2: What reasons might I have to NOT separate from my spouse? When facing a troubled relationship, it is easy to want to get away as quickly as possible. Don't make this mistake. Separating couples often forget to consider a plethora of reasons which might make it more constructive to stay together, however unpleasant the ordeal may appear. These factors include: Taxes - married couples may file taxes differently and receive different tax deductions and rates. Separating may cause you to pay more to the IRS. Children - Not only can separating from your spouse hurt your children psychologically and emotionally, but it may also hurt your chances of winning a child custody battle in the future. Psychology - Does moving out signify giving up? Does it send the wrong signal to your spouse and encourage him or her to try and take advantage of you? These are tough psychological questions you must consider. Question 3: Do I need a formal, legal separation? If you are committed to pursuing a separation from your spouse, you must decide whether or not you need to obtain an official, legal separation, or whether you are comfortable separating on an informal basis. Keep in mind two things. First, in order to separate informally, both you and your spouse need to agree on the purpose of the separation and be on sufficiently amicable terms to approach the situation in a calm, logical manner. Otherwise, an informal separation can quickly lead to more arguments and disputes than it solves. Second, consider the impact of getting a legal separation. Will your spouse see a legal separation as further incentive for divorce, or as a reason to become more hostile against you? Are you comfortable with setting out your relationship in legal terms, or will it create more problems? Don't take these issues lightly; they could mean the difference between marriage, divorce, and disaster. To learn more about important issues relating to divorce and child custody, consult the resources provided by the Austin family law attorneys from Slater & Kennon at their website: http://www.slaterkennon.com. Child Custody Center: http://www.custodycv.tk/